Sunday, June 10, 2012

There is also a trick for praising children

When children do something great, what do you do as a parent? Surely you praise him. However, you should be careful to praise them too often, because these false praise actually has a negative impact on them.

"Positive praise or labeling on children on the one hand can indeed arouse children's enthusiasm, but on the other hand it can also have a bad influence," said Najelaa Shihab to Kompas Female, in a talkshow "Myths and Facts of Early Stimulation at Home" at the Breastfeeding Fair 2012 which was held by the Indonesian Breastfeeding Mothers Association (AIMI) at Grand Indonesia, Central Jakarta, Wednesday (05/02/2012) ago.

Najelaa added, the way to give wrong praise for a long time turned out to affect a child's behavior to be bad, lazy, or even worse: to underestimate others. In order for this praise to have a positive impact on the child, pay attention to the rules:

1. Praise the process, not the results

When praising children, parents often only focus on the results the child gets. When a child becomes a class champion, parents will praise the child with the words, "Wow, you're smart", or "You're smart". "This sentence should be avoided when praising children," said Najelaa.

The words "smart" and "smart" are actually a result of the learning process that children do. In order for parents to have a good impact on children in the long run, you should praise them by using words that value their learning process, such as "You have learned diligently, to be a class champion".

Another example, you should avoid the word "Very beautiful mama child", and replace it with the phrase "Wow, the clothes you choose fit in your body", or "Your hair is very neat", and so on. This sentence focuses more on the process of the work they have done, and this will help them to understand that all that is done has benefits for their development.
"The negative effect when continuing to praise the child with the words 'clever', 'beautiful', and others that refer to results only, will make children think that this is from 'sononya', so they will assume that they do not need to fight anymore to get it all, "he explained.

2. Specify it

Maybe you often praise your child with the phrase "You're great", but you should avoid this. Although this sentence is a compliment sentence that sounds fun to others, but a sentence like this will not imprint on the child's heart, and it will make them confused. "Express your praise in specific sentences, and explain to them why you praise their actions," he advised.

Children do not have thoughts like adults who are able to digest every word perfectly, and understand the meaning correctly. When expressing the word "You are great", this is actually not yet a perfect compliment for a child.

Preferably, reveal why you call them great, such as "You're great because you want to eat vegetables". Specific sentences will make children record all the "great" activities they do, and the great things you hope they can do again later on.

Fimadani/The Truth Seeker Media

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